I-Hate-Apostrophes

That’s all.

I hate apostrophes.

I will never naturally be able to write them accurately as I write.

His, he’s, theirs’, hers, she’s, its, it’s (oh, do I HATE that pair!)

Hmm, did I just have a breakthrough? His, Hers, Its. He’s, She’s, It’s — no, no breakthrough. IT sucks. The apostrophe sucks.

I tumble down the stairs, my broken body piled at the bottom, a jumble of limbs, twisted and bent, my neck unnaturally backwards, my face looking back up at you with this pleading expression, “Why, why is the apostrophe so hard to ingrain into my brain?”

You look down the stairwell, disdain on your face and say to me, “You should try Cyrillic!”

 

 


5 thoughts on “I-Hate-Apostrophes

    1. Funny you should mention that.
      There is a post I did a year or so ago which analyzes punctuation and the literary novel. I found some tools to extract counts of things like sentences, phrases, exclamations, etc.
      What I found was rather striking. That thing, the semicolon, is used WAY more often by literary authors than what my limited analysis shows popular fiction authors use.
      If you’re going for lofty – go semi-pro.

      Liked by 1 person

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s