Warning: You look nice

Gender differentiation has come to an end in the office.

WarningYouLookNice

Hi Sally, you look nice today.

HOW DARE YOU OBJECTIFY ME.
I’LL SEE YOU IN COURT!

The end of any, and I do mean any, kind of attribute acknowledgement: hair length, skin tone (tan), clothing length (or curvature, or clingy-ness, or plunge, or exposure, color, material), weight, height, eye color, anything that is a physical attribute — is over!

Do not comment on ANY work-mate’s attire or appearance. Do not compliment them. Do not acknowledge any change (good or bad) in their physical appearance. If you would not say it in-gender then do not say it out of gender. In summary:

DO NOT ACKNOWLEDGE THEIR HUMANITY!

You must treat every team member in your office as though they are a robotic member of your team. They have a mind and produce results. THAT IS IT!

This is the world we have created. Never mind that you’re an animal with hormones and desires and reactions and turn-offs and attractions. You WILL NOT EXPOSE YOUR HUMANITY IN THE OFFICE!

Maybe this is as it should be. Every fellow worker is there on their merit solely (right?). They are there to do a job — as are you. Physical attributes of team members should not enter into any of your conversations as you discuss your job.

Unfortunately, gender bias is part of our culture. Men have traditionally been dominant, women subservient — in the workplace. I don’t agree with this historical fact, but it is a fact. The notion that it can be instantly wiped away — is a fallacy. It will take time for the business world to eliminate all forms of gender expression and the corresponding biases.

If you’re a man — stop thinking of women as women. They have a mind and can type ideas into computers or perform technical or tactical work tasks.

If you’re a woman — accept that men are dumb as fuck and will take generations to learn this lesson. So, if you could, do us the courtesy of dressing in man’s clothing while you’re in the office rather than the drop-dead sexy strip-tease shit you wear and then complain when men leer at you.  Kindly wear business appropriate attire while you are working.

Thank you,
The [temporarily-male-dominant] Management.

 

 


16 responses to “Warning: You look nice

  • Duke Miller

    Did you notice the letter from the French women on this issue? I love French women…they are so manly yet unmanly at the same time. Duke

    Like

  • Andrew Freedman

    Gosh I feel a little out of my depth seeing all the intelligent banter here. No matter. It’s suffice to say, the gender issue is being addressed by society, as woman are now looking to raise our children ‘gender neutral.’

    Penises will eventually wither and fall off, as will vaginas seal up, becoming the excessively-hairy-no-go-domains woman-man really want them to be.

    As is my belief, non of this really matters, as long as we continue to procreate long enough – for the intelligentsia to design and build the self aware AI’s we’re destined to become – all will be well.

    Happy New Year!

    Liked by 1 person

  • Duke Miller

    Hi AMole,

    You have it totally correct! Congratulations. I recall Player Piano by Vgut with a part on equality. Really good dancers trying out for the Bolshoi would have to wear bricks strapped to their ankles in order to level the competition. However, 1984 is the logical outcome of your ideas. Everyone in grey clothes, soft slippers, voices low, sex cold, beer warm (thanks Tom), no hope, dull stares, bad drugs, spaceships, and beds sailing to distant ports where death is dressed like an admiral (thanks Pablo). Really…what is to be done? No hope in my opinion. Thanks. Duke

    Liked by 1 person

    • Duke Miller

      Oh and a Merry Christmas to you and family! Thanks. Duke

      Liked by 1 person

    • Anony Mole

      A righteous Bacchanalia to you as well.

      1984 may indeed be the (hopefully temporary) destination. Can men learn to defuse their predatory intents? And can women learn to de-escalate their feelings of threat while simultaneously accepting that they will always be targets of desire? All the while having popular media exacerbate the tensions between the two?

      Naw. Who are we kidding?

      Like

  • Dr Martina Feyzrakhmanova

    The aeon article is like 1/10 of the length they normally are!

    Liked by 2 people

    • Anony Mole

      Maybe Aeon is starting to figure out that people just don’t have 20 minutes to burn on 3k-5k micro-novels. (Or people have the time, but they sure as hell refuse to waste it on bloated narrative. Get to the damn point, I say.) 300 words/minute. 1000 words = three minutes. If a writer of topical, daily articles can’t get their point out in 1000 words, they had better write like Stephen King or James Patterson.

      Liked by 1 person

  • desertcurmudgeon

    I always compliment my colleagues on their excellent bilateral symmetry. If my boss were to hire an amputee, I’d be in big trouble.

    Liked by 2 people

  • Tom Being Tom

    I feel this is written with a tongue and a cheek?

    Obviously, its an over-reaction to the times (and meant to be, I presume). Being complimentary, over even flattering, is a time-tested method of office cohabitation. Pressing a co-worker for amorous affection in lieu of workplace backlash, or showing them your genitalia in any unwanted fashion, is not.

    I will continue to harmlessly flatter throughout this necessary social revolution, and will likewise continue to respect. ✊

    Liked by 2 people

  • George F.

    Ah, I see the lined you edited and crossed out…you didn’t know it was there, did you? So you are old school…blaming the victim are we? Gotcha!

    Liked by 2 people

    • Anony Mole

      Society is a swamp of behavioral contradictions, the office a quagmire. The dichotomy of simultaneously being driven by base instincts and having to suppress those same instincts confounds most men; the onus of this balance falling primarily upon the male of the species.

      In early 2001 I worked, for 2 months, for a software firm managed by a woman. She wore very revealing clothing, would sit on programmers’ (men) desk and chat. I left knowing full well that was a bad situation. She later sued that company for sexual harassment.

      Are we animals or drones? Legally, we are drones.

      Like

      • George F.

        “the onus of this balance falling primarily upon the male of the species.” Well said. It’s no mystery women live, on average 11 years longer than men. Early death is the ultimate result of this oppression, but no one cares, ’cause by that time men are worthless…past both their reproductive and earning prime. We are drones my doppleganger friend.

        Liked by 1 person

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