BodyScale: 0 to 100

Celsius is great for science. 0 freezing, 100 boiling – perfectly logical.

Fahrenheit is just bonkers. Totally screwball with no logic behind it whatsoever.

But the problem with Celsius (we’ll disregard Fahrenheit due to irrelevance) is that Celsius has only one immediately human identifiable anchoring: 0 degrees freezing. At 100°, the boiling point of pure water at sea level—yeah, great. Not exactly relatable (not really). How warm is the human body? 37 degrees. Hmm, 37, not a number that sits well in our minds. Instead…

How about a human relatable scale:

• 0 = freezing point of water.
• 100 = human body temperature.

Here’s how such a scale would compare to Celsius…

0 is 0. That’s easy. We are frozen solid at 0 Centigrade as well as 0 BodyScale.

But at 100° BodyScale, we’re exactly where we need to be (37°C).

Now, based on 0-100° degrees BS we have a natural range we can understand.

At 50° BS, we’re pretty comfortable — half way from body temp to freezing.

At -50° BS, that’s damn cold (-19°C), and that’s about our limit.

At 150° BS, that’s about our top limit, frickin’ hot. Hot to the touch; sauna hot. But still, if you were outside, walkin’ around, drinking lots of fluids, 150° BS is tolerable. See how this is working?

Zero BS to 100° BS is our natural range. It makes sense to us in our ten-fingered numerical system within our human condition. Additionally, -50° BS to 150° BS would be our natural  range extent. Again, logical extensions of our 0-100 range.

Celsius has two numbers which make human sense, 0 & 100. One is relatable, the other is “touch and suffer.”

We humans like relatable numbers. That’s why the metric system is so hard to take. (See: https://anonymole.com/2015/08/18/the-problem-with-the-metric-system/ )

A weatherman, lying about tomorrow’s sunny day, who used BodyScale as their temperature gauge would make perfect sense.

“Tonight’s overnight temperature will be 60° BS and 85° BS by tomorrow afternoon—a nice day, so go have fun!”

And medically, using such a scale would also make sense.

• 104° BodyScale, a bit of a fever.
• At 95° BS, you’re suffering from hypothermia!
• 100° – spot on, mate.

Even that 100° C seems misleading, “100°C? Yeah, OK”.
But at 270° BS. 270°! Shit, that sounds hot! And it is. Hot enough to boil water…

(Oh, and the “BS” initialism is an ironic coincidence…)

 Celsius BodyScale -40 -108 -30 -81 -19 -50 -10 -27 0 0 10 27 20 54 30 81 37 100 40 108 50 135 55 150 70 189 80 216 90 243 100 270 110 297 120 324 130 351 140 378 150 405 160 432 170 459 180 486 190 514 200 541

7 thoughts on “BodyScale: 0 to 100”

1. It’s a fun idea, but I already have difficulty keeping track of Fahrenheit and Centigrade and converting between the two. I reckon it takes about 50 years, if ever, to adapt to the measure you did not grow up with. I still think in inches, and always have to convert from centimeters. But somehow I think in centigrade, although growing up with fahrenheit – I guess because Fahrenheit is so lacking in logic! Anyway, great post!.

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2. Duke Miller says:

Hi A.Mole,

You made no mention of either jalapeno or habanero in this post. A grave error. Perhaps you have not experienced going from bar to bar on a hot Texas day carrying a gallon can of jalapenos, ordering a pitcher of beer and then eating and drinking on the deck beneath the sun. The whole experience normally ended in a puking event behind a fence or garbage dumpster. I wonder how much one’s body temperature rises when eating peppers. What of sex in the sun? These are things that probably accumulate in the body, driving the temperature upward. I just signed up for cremation. Picked out the painted, plastic dog bones from China as my urn. I’ll need five for the whole body. Turns out the oven for me has a maximum temperature of 2,000 F. Owner said he decided to go first class and go above the 1,400 – 1,800 degrees of the competition. I think the human body needs somewhere around 1,600 F for complete transition. Yes, A.Mole, our whole life is about transition, moving from one point to the next, trying to reach that moment when we can say, “Yes, this is who I am.” I’m not there yet. Maybe it is for the oven to really place me where I need to be. When I was living in southeast Asia, I’d come upon the pyres down by the river and I’d sit there contemplating everything and it was in those moments that I decided upon fire instead of the slow decay underground, burial at sea, or the birds stripping my body. Anyway, interesting post and let’s try to enjoy our breathing time. Thanks. Duke

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1. In SpaceX’s latest launch they sent spaceward the ashes of folks who’d paid the price of stardust immortality. Those responsible, still earthbound, no doubt imagine their loved ones mingling with the cosmic consciousness. Sentimental fools. But, whatever eases the burden of existence. I’d prefer going down knowing I’d be dished up a la Valentine Smith, a bitter stew indeed.

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3. June 28th, 2019:

** France records all-time highest temperature of 45.9C **

45.9°C…

What does that even mean? How do you relate to that temperature? See, you can’t. But, if they’d said 134°BS, hmm. That’s 34 degrees hotter than me. That’s damn close to human maximum of 150°. Sheesh! That’s hot.

What’s interesting is that the hottest temperature recorded (natural weather) was 56.7°C. And guess what? That’s right around that magic number of 150°BS (about 155 — damn hot!).

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