NRA: Nefarious Ravagers Anonymous

As a writer I tend to stand slack-jawed when I witness unexpected, fiction-worthy stories in the news. I think, how can reality create something so fantastical, so eyebrow twistingly warped, when fiction itself fails to compete?

It’s not that a not-for-profit entity collected sewer level executives to lead them.

It’s not that an ancient, heralded establishment became contaminated by vicious, greedy henchmen beholden only to their equally contemptuous brethren.

It’s not that a revered institution, once noble and forthright, succumbed to corruption, an internal rot the likes of which only a napalm enema could be rid of.

It’s that such a story line feels so utterly obvious that it should have been exposed through countless spy or intrigue novels over the last forty years.

The NRA is headed by crooks who used their power to buy candidates and boats and planes and take vacations to the islands? Duh! Quick, somebody write a novel.

(I sure hope the lead NY attorney knows how to protect herself…)

This era in politics will go down as one of obviousness. No shit the people we hire to run the country are nothing but scoundrels and self-serving egotists. That the so called President of the country has fewer scruples than a snapping turtle? That every fucking thing he’s done since being in office was to further his personal aggrandizement or his brainless agendas? That everyone he’s hired has been a stoolie, a lackey, or a cad for him and his promises of wealth — on the other side — if they don’t go turncoat and write a book about his idiocy?

No shit. None of this should be surprising. So, why is it we’re dumbfounded when things like this actually happen? That is, why hasn’t fiction done its job and warned us?


In my teens, I was a member of the NRA. Hell, I was on the high school rifle team; went to college on a scholarship for marksmanship. So, go NRA!

But not now. Back then? Sure. Now? Well, look at what it stands for these days, archaic, out-of-touch nonsense and who runs that fucked-up bass-ackwards perversion of an institution. Dissolve the NRA?

About goddamn time!


4 thoughts on “NRA: Nefarious Ravagers Anonymous

  1. Not sure about dissolution, ’cause hell, most all those places are corrupt. You get a free car and a free lunch and pretty soon you’re in there with the real criminals living off other people’s money, politicians. NAMM. National association of music merchants. According to the flyers they do all sorts of good work. They ride around conventions in limos, have their meetings in exotic locales. Worked for a man who called them out, demanded to see their books. They immediately moved the bookkeeping offshore away from prying eyes and court orders. Hmmm. It doesn’t matter if it’s the Major in charge of the local Salvation Army with his free house full of free shit and his free car(s) or the NRA or NAMM or MADD or the School Board Director of Bumfuck Texas with a big free house and free landscaping or a big new pool from contractors working the kickback. Even the people in charge of booking the company plane’s tarmac time and all the peripherals, they have a big budget and no oversight you’d be (not) shocked at what sort of shit from Victoria’s Secret to Jet Skis and F-150s end up on the chargeoff sheet. Make it look like toilet paper come audit time, nobody flinches. yeah, fire the shmucks. But a legal suit is down to the NRA filing. All the SA has is a civil suit for malfeasance, maybe. Just like the rest of the OIP parade, she’s looking for a better job with bigger graft potential and what better way than headlines.

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