Writer’s Log: 2480

She lifted her skirt and began to dance. At first, Adella only swished and stepped. But soon her rhythmic hips whispered to her wrists and they to her shoulders and they, in turn, to her voice. The words to the song came easily. Memorized through years of communal singing, the lyrics burst out with vibrant trills and shouts. All eyes followed her. Adella’s crimson blouse, its ruffles wavering, gave fleeting peeks. Her bleach-white skirt billowed and flashed her tan legs. She cast back her head and laughed. “Frederico, Marcello, join me. Margarete, Chicas, please don’t let me dance alone.”

Who could deny her? Glasses drained and chairs squeaked and soon the family and all their friends were dancing. Dancing with abandon, without a thought as to who pranced well and who only shuffled, who matched the beat and who fumbled to keep up.

Dance releases something within our hearts, a connection to our primordial spirits. Joy bubbles up and tingles our senses, lifts our step, loosens our restraints. To dance is to open oneself to the world.

Adella dropped the hem of her dress and clutched her breast. A great squeezing had seized her lungs. At sixty, she imagined living until her hair turned white as Mama’s. Her daughter, Consuela, caught sight of her stricken face and rushed to catch her as she slumped to the dance floor.

The polls are in.

For nearly all of you, you read the above without prejudice of content or doubt as to quality. The editor in you remained quiescent, perhaps only bumping your conscious at that authorial interjection I let slip.

I’m afraid I do not join you in this trend.

I do applaud you though. I hope you never lose such an ability.

Thanks for stopping by.

14 thoughts on “Writer’s Log: 2480

  1. I laughed when I read this one because I told you last time that I read as a reader and not an editor and yet in the first sentence – I wonder how many skirts she had on. You later only go on to describe one skirt and/or a dress. Once I was able to get over that typo, I enjoyed dancing with your characters.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. It’s interesting what writing can say about the writER. To write something as visceral as this piece, I imagine you must have experienced it. There’s joy there. I would have happily read it just for the joy. Why kill it? Literally?

    Liked by 1 person

  3. I don’t want dancers who want to dance. I want dancers who have to dance – George Balanchine.
    I do not try to dance better than anyone else. I only try to dance better than myself – Mikhail Baryshnikov.

    There’s a simple fix for that ‘dance is’ paragraph but it would force you to connect with the character. But to each their own narrative concerns, eh? Some of us have enough trouble with derivatives.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Hi A. Mole,

    Okay … got to say, she lifted her skirt, is a great beginning. The great squeeze, is a close second insofar as imagery. The final postscript about editorial intent was Wpress meta. All in all, a good read and thought provoking. Where the hell is 2022 going? Any thoughts?

    Liked by 2 people

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